Have I ever mentioned how I think we have too many states?
Take for instance the Midwest. North Dakota, South Dakota, Kansas, Oklahoma, all that.
Why aren't they just one big state? They all produce basically the same product: Crops. What little tourism there is, is generated by people stopping at Gas Stations on their way to more interesting states, like Nevada, Hippie-Land, or North Mexico (Called by their Provinces, Arizona and New Mexico.)
To prove my point, here's a fancy diagram:
Yeah, you see that?
I got images now. Soon, its going to be charts and graphs.
As I was saying. Everything from the FAIL line, until Nevada, excluding Texas and North Mexico, shall become part of the new state: The Midwest. It can have such exciting tourist attractions as:
Mountains!
Rivers!
Corn!
Other Growing Stuff! (Literally watch it grow!)
Speaking of useless states, what is Alaska doing right now? Nothing, that's what. Nothing but hoarding its oil and biding its time, until it can slip out the door with no one noticing, like the guy who takes the last box of pizza at a party.
I've done research on this. The reason we aren't drilling for the oil is because apparently, there's a Protected Range there. It protects Caribou. Quite possibly the most useless animal in the world.
Do you know what Caribou are used for?
Jack. Shit.
Have you ever walked into somewhere and bought Caribou Steak? Caribou Legs? No. Because no one eats Caribou- At least, not the ones we're protecting. So we're protecting an animal that does nothing but sit on its fat rear all day and enjoy Federal protection.
Screw that. Lets drill the oil. And the Caribou with it.
